Formula 1
Secret Diary of Michael Schumacher: Part 9
Part Neun: A large howdy to my partners and buddies everywhere
Yes, I am in America. Did you guess from the way I am speaking hello to you. This is always a time of the year that Corinna and I take the children for a big holiday in the United States. As they say here on the Stateside, we have hopped over our pond. And the great thing is, nobody is understanding who I am or what I do to earn a livelihood.
I can walk anywhere I like without being given some hassle or some nuisance. You know I would not replace my job with another, but sometimes the never ending questions, people sticking their noses in my face, the interference is too much. And that's just the Ferrari test team at Fiorano.
(A small joke to get us warming.)
I like America very much. A big country, with big ideas and big people. So much bigness all in one big place that I am almost inspired to move here. We would have no problems getting permission for our ranch that Corinna has set her heart upon. It is a country where they value ranches and horses and you can go ranching wherever you like without having a big environmental battle. It is not run by small-minded, cuckoo clock makers who are envious of successful people from outside their country.
However I am running away in front of myself without telling you all about our latest triumph of Monza.
It was such a nice race to finish with our seventh Ferrari 1-2 of the year. It is nice also that with very little doubt Rubens is finishing second in the championship. After the race had finished I said to Jean Todt, with no part of a smile creeping into the corner of my mouth, 'Now all we have to do is try and help Sauber reach 4th place in the constructors' championship'. Do you know, he actually stopped and thought about it for several moments.
We certainly have enough trophies back home already. Frau Blucher, who has cleaned for us since before the birth of Mick, said she is going to write to the FIA and ask them to make smaller trophies. (She is very old and so complaining comes naturally to her.) Also the space in my specially designed trophy display studio is running out.
In devising the room I made a budget for receiving seven winning trophies and six assorted podium trophies for each of the 2000, 2001 and 2002 seasons, but we have outstretched this by quite a lot recently!
On top of race prizes I am winning awards from magazines, newspapers and motor sport institutions, some of which I am keeping but most sending to the Schumacher museum in Kerpen.
Before the race weekend at Monza, Frau Blucher is asking me if it is still necessary to have my full-size podium at one end of the room for when I want to spend time with my trophies, and saying in a moaning voice, 'wouldn't it be better to have it in the gym, Herr Michael? That way you could practice your jumps...'
No. This is not practical. I would then have to take my trophies all the way into the gym, you moaning old cheese board! - this is me thinking, not me speaking, you understand.
She has no idea. I have the German and Italian national anthems cued up ready to play on the sound system, I have my new Ferrari overalls to change into, why alter everything round just to please her?
A worrying piece of news in Italy was the bad back of Ross Brawn. Many Formula 1 people are giving up because of bad backs. I remember one of my old mechanics from my Benetton days, Steve Matchett, had to quit because of a bad back and he is now hooked on drugs. It is so sad. Someone told me in the paddock the other day, that Steve Matchett is on Speed, almost all the time. It's a terrible way to end up.
I am not wanting this to happen to Ross and though the big fellow has not revealed the information to me, I have some suspecting that it is partly my fault. In celebrating race wins I jump on top of him, enthusiastically. He has often said to me, "Careful Michael we're not Torville and Dean." Whoever they are.
Italy was a good race and we are looking forward to another fine performance at Indianapolis. As I was telling you, my absence of fame here in the USA has a funny side. When we are filling up the car, a man in the petrol station heard my accent and asked me if I was a tourist. I said yes, I had come over for the US Grand Prix.
"Oh," he said "Is Billy Boat taking part?:
"No," I said, "But Roger Racing car and Tommy Transporter will be there."
He didn't laugh.
Perhaps my comedy does not travel.
<< Part 8 | Secret Diary of Michael Schumacher | Part 10 >>
Disclaimer: I am not the author, but have archived these entries for posterity as I felt that they were so well written by "Michael Schumacher" for Planet-F1 (who have removed almost all of the originals from their website).
